Going Dark

Whether by conscious choice, by lack of time, or just forgetfulness, I’ve “gone dark” for the past 6 months. I could give you a few of the reasons – the craziness of time, a new job, attempting to balance all of the spinning plates without letting any fall, only to have one fall and then pick up the pieces, or simply just that thing we call life. Regardless, I have been quiet. And, I have missed writing. Like in previous posts, many writing ideas and thoughts come to my head, but I don’t take the time to write.  So, let’s try again, shall we?  This blog seems to have a positive benefit on my mental health, so that would be nice right now in a house of three teen girls who are lovely, wonderful, but oh so full of questions.  Not the questions of where is this or that (but there are some of those), but those questions about our world, people, life, God, and future (just to name a few) that can’t be answered flippantly.

For today, let’s just have a recap of life the past 6 months in pictures.  That is always fun!  Enjoy – and I’ll see you again soon. 🙂

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I’ve been missing.  Missing writing.  Missing my blog.  Missing days that seem to zoom by too quickly.  Missing moments because I am too caught up in the next moment coming.  Simply missing.

But, here I am now.  Choosing today to begin again and not miss my writing and my blogging.  One thing that has struck me over and over again these past months is how hard it is to be present in the moment.  Everything around me begs for my attention to the next thing, the big idea, the Plan A, the “what are we going to do … ” and “how are we going to …”  It is almost just as tumultuous to try and plan as it is to stay in the present!  DSC_1357

Just this morning, I was reminded of my Savior’s words in Matthew 6 – “Therefore, do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself.  Each day has enough trouble of its own.”  I used to think that was easy…and it some aspects it is, and if embraced can be quite freeing.  But these days, that seems to be very hard when our future looms with big life decisions for our family (you know- college, dating, adult-hood for our kids…).

Alas, though, these burdens are too much for me to carry and I am not meant to carry them.  I have One Who rules the world, Who sees the yesterdays, todays and tomorrows, and Who loves me beyond comprehension.  That One is on my side and I turn to Him.  Releasing these worries and burdens and trusting Him.  He is a good God who has a plan, sees the big picture, and I can trust Him.  Period.

So – here is to hoping I am one step closer to departing from dwelling in the land of the Missing and beginning a journey to the land of the Present.